The Recommendation

A few months ago I heard someone at work recommending a book. Oftentimes those recommendations are great books, but generally secular business books. I enjoy reading many of those titles. They help formulate a plan or a system to improve habit formation, communicate more effectively, and manage your responsibilities like a pro. I continue to read titles like that and determine what I can implement to improve myself. That was not the case for this one. It was a book written about anger. Unoffendable by Brant Hansen was a compelling read that fundamentally challenges the idea that we (Christians primarily, but it certainly applies to all humans) should let go of all types of anger. He doesn’t make exceptions, doesn’t provide allowances, and includes no caveats. All anger should be released.

That’s a hard message to swallow for most people. My dad did very negative things that culminated in leaving the family. I should be able to be angry about that, shouldn’t I? The criminals that do horrible things to people should merit some anger, shouldn’t they? Brant’s case is made with scripture. We are prone to anger, and the Bible addresses it without exceptions.

James 1:19-20 HCSB

My dearly loved brothers, understand this: Everyone must be quick to hear, slow to speak, and slow to anger, for man’s anger does not accomplish God’s righteousness.

I have held anger for years about bad things done by others. My genuine question in the face of scripture like this passage in James is “How do I address the travesty?” Is it my place to address them is the answer that comes to mind. I can’t administer justice to the criminal. I can’t punish them for their crimes in any way. I can’t change my dad, and now that he has passed, I can’t address the hurts, real and perceived, that he caused.

The Bible is clear that my job is not about bringing justice down on the wicked. I can’t properly judge the heart of those I would call wicked. My standard isn’t perfect. God’s is. My job is to forgive as I have been forgiven. Loving the people that are easy to love is just that…easy. The rubber hits the road when we sacrifice the anger we feel we are entitled to hold for our enemies. We are called to love our enemies.

‭‭Matthew‬ ‭5‬:‭43‬-‭45‬ ‭HCSB‬‬

You have heard that it was said, Love your neighbor and hate your enemy. But I tell you, love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you, so that you may be sons of your Father in heaven. For He causes His sun to rise on the evil and the good, and sends rain on the righteous and the unrighteous.

I’m constantly finding areas in my life that could be better. For me this was the next step. God owns vengeance. He is just. He can see the heart. I need to give him any of the bitterness, hurt. and pain I experience. I need to let it go. I must forgive. There will still be boundaries. They must be in place for people that are just toxic and negatively affect us or our loved ones, but we must not do this in anger, but with love.

Bad things will still happen. We should be surprised by that fact. We are messed up people and we live in a messed up world. As believers we are told to be in this world but not OF it. It’s a call to be different. Human nature is to respond in anger to any perceived injustice or wrong. God’s nature is to provide a way to be justified even when I was the one that did the wrong. He provided forgiveness. We show that we are different when we stay ready to forgive.

I will probably read that book a few times. I need to get better at releasing my anger even when I feel it is just, and forgive. I want to be like Christ. I want to be a Fellow Warrior even when those serving around me are messed up (I know I still am), and get that message of forgiveness to others so they can join in following our true king.